Episode 19 - Why Choosing Yourself Is the Ultimate Business Strategy

Sometimes the moment they overlook you becomes the moment you become unstoppable. If you're tired of waiting to be chosen, promoted, or even just seen in your industry, this message is for you.

For over a decade, many entrepreneurs find themselves in the same exhausting cycle: doing the work, playing the part, helping others shine, all while hoping someone will eventually tap them on the shoulder and say "it's your turn." But what happens when that day never comes? What if getting kicked to the curb becomes the catalyst for your greatest success?

The Waiting Game That Never Ends

You show up consistently, do everything right, yet still feel invisible. Whether it's buyers who won't return calls, investors who pass on your pitch, or industry colleagues who overlook your contributions, the pattern feels familiar and frustrating.

The question becomes: what else do you need to do to be seen, picked, or chosen? But here's the revolutionary truth - you don't need to be seen by them to start showing up for yourself.

When Rejection Becomes Redirection

The shift from waiting to choosing happens in a single moment of clarity. When external validation stops coming, internal validation must begin. This transition often feels uncomfortable because it requires abandoning the safety of seeking approval for the uncertainty of self-determination.

Consider the experience of building something entirely new after years of waiting. Within months of choosing self-direction, entrepreneurs often accomplish more than they did in years of seeking permission. They launch podcasts they'd delayed for years, build sub-brands, create automated systems, and develop their voice in ways that surprise even themselves.

The depth of talent that emerges when you stop waiting for others to recognize it can be startling. Just because they couldn't see your potential doesn't mean it wasn't there.

The Protection in Rejection

Jamie Kern Lima, founder of It Cosmetics (acquired by L'Oréal for over a billion dollars), experienced this transformation firsthand. Before building her empire, she faced constant rejection from investors who told her she didn't have "the right look" to sell beauty products on television. She was literally laughed out of rooms.

Her perspective on rejection offers crucial insight: "Sometimes rejection is not just a redirection. It's a protection. It's the universe saying you're not meant to play small in that room. You're meant to build your own."

This reframe transforms rejection from personal failure into strategic redirection. When you're not meant to play small in someone else's room, you're meant to build your own space where your vision can flourish.

From Permission-Seeking to Power-Building

Choosing yourself represents a fundamental business strategy shift. Instead of chasing permission, you build power. Rather than waiting to be discovered, you deliver your own value. You stop playing roles others wrote for you and start writing your own story.

This approach becomes particularly crucial in industries where small business owners hope for validation from major retailers or influencers. While waiting for one big "yes" from external sources, entrepreneurs often miss recognizing they already possess everything needed to grow their business.

Success might not happen overnight or through traditional channels, but with consistency, creativity, vision, and authentic voice, sustainable growth becomes achievable when you give yourself permission to proceed.

The Strategy of Self-Selection

Choosing yourself isn't just motivational rhetoric - it's a practical business strategy. When you stop trying to fit someone else's mold and start carving your own path, several advantages emerge:

Clarity of Mission: Without external expectations constraining your vision, you can pursue ideas that genuinely excite and motivate you.

Authentic Voice Development: Your unique perspective becomes an asset rather than something to hide or modify for others' comfort.

Freedom from Limitations: Other people's constraints no longer define your possibilities or timeline.

Direct Value Creation: You can serve people who actually want your help rather than trying to convince skeptics.

Rapid Implementation: Without waiting for approval, you can test ideas, iterate quickly, and respond to market feedback in real-time.

Building Your Own Room

The transition from seeking selection to self-selection requires practical action. Your coaching challenge this week: make one bold move that declares "I choose me."

This might involve launching an idea you've been developing, creating content you've been afraid to share, sending a pitch you've been hesitating over, or building the brand they never saw coming.

These actions don't require anyone else's permission or approval. They simply require your commitment to your own vision and willingness to serve people who are actually waiting for your guidance.

The People Waiting for Your Brilliance

While you're focused on gaining attention from those who overlook you, remember that other people are actively waiting for your expertise, perspective, and solutions. By constantly seeking validation from non-believers, you potentially neglect serving those who would genuinely benefit from your work.

Choosing yourself allows you to redirect energy from convincing skeptics toward helping enthusiastic supporters. This shift often creates more sustainable and fulfilling business relationships.

Beyond the Fear of Self-Selection

The fear of choosing yourself often stems from conditioning that external validation equals legitimacy. But consider successful entrepreneurs who built thriving businesses without traditional gatekeepers' approval. They created value, served customers, and built sustainable enterprises by trusting their vision and executing consistently.

Your capability doesn't depend on others recognizing it. Your market doesn't require traditional intermediaries to access it. Your success doesn't need anyone else's permission to begin.

The Most Important Yes

When you choose yourself fully and without apology, you become undeniable - not to everyone, but to yourself and those who need your specific contribution. This internal "yes" often proves more valuable than any external approval you might have been seeking.

The clarity, mission, vision, and freedom that come from self-selection create foundation for sustainable success that doesn't depend on others' changing opinions or arbitrary decisions.

Your Moment of Choice

If being overlooked has left you feeling frustrated or invisible, consider reframing this experience as preparation for independence. The skills you've developed while waiting, the resilience you've built through rejection, and the clarity you've gained about what you truly want to create - these become assets when you decide to choose yourself.

The moment you stop waiting to be chosen and start choosing yourself might feel scary, but it also represents the beginning of building something entirely your own. And that something could become far more significant than anything you might have achieved within someone else's limitations.

Sometimes the most powerful business strategy is simply giving yourself permission to begin.